Archive for April, 2011

Chatty Cathy is giving my team a presentation this morning on a new user interface that we will be testing. Chatty Cathy went through the presentation with me about six months ago in a one on one meeting. I was beyond bored. Two months ago Chatty Cathy gave the same presentation in a staff meeting I attended. I’d rather burn in a fire than listen to Chatty Cathy give this presentation again. I tried to get out of today’s meeting but Chatty Cathy insisted I attend because there would be new and important information presented. Later this morning I will get paid to sit in a conference room and be bored to death. I’m sure I’ll be day dreaming about lunch.

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A Crazy Barb Story

Crazy Barb called Mike because she couldn’t start her two year old Toyota that she uses for errands and for taking the dog to the park for walks. She doesn’t like to drive the dog around in her new BMW so the dog didn’t get a walk that day. Mike walks across the street to see what’s wrong with the Toyota. Mike tells Barb the Toyota needs a new battery. Barb tells Mike to order her a new car because it’s too much trouble to deal with buying a new battery. It took Mike a half hour to convince Barb that she didn’t need a new car since the Toyota only has a few thousands miles on it. The next day Mike bought and installed a new battery in Barb’s Toyota. Barb still thinks she needs a new car but will drive the Toyota for a couple more months.

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A Close Call

My brother called on Friday night with news of the St. Louis tornado. The news reports made it sound like the tornado hit my parent’s neighborhood and they could not be reached by phone as the power was off. My mother was not answering her cell phone either. The major highways leading to my parent’s house were closed.

After several hours of calling back and forth my brother finally reached a childhood friend whose mother lives across the street from my parents. He told my brother there was extensive damage in the surrounding area but my parent’s neighborhood was untouched.

My brother drove to my parent’s house on Saturday morning and called to confirm they were safe. My mother didn’t have her cell phone turned on and my dad did not know how to turn it on. My brother gave my dad a lesson in cell phone 101 and then went home.

Now we only have to worry about cancer and my mother’s failing health.

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Strange Office Behavior

Chatty Cathy bought a package of chocolate chip cookies at Costco and brought them to work. He set them out next to the microwave and sent out an email inviting the group to enjoy them. I walked by the microwave a few minutes ago on my way to talk to a developer. The empty cookie package was sitting by the microwave. Why didn’t the person who took the last cookie throw the empty plastic container in the trash? This seems to be standard behavior in this office. A person will eat the last cookie but is too fucking lazy to put the empty container in the trash. I don’t know why this bugs me but it does.

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I Called It

T was in a bad mood yesterday. I only exchanged a few words with her all day. She arrived a little after nine and immediately made it clear that she wasn’t having a good day. She didn’t need to say anything. I could tell by the wig and baseball cap she was wearing. T never does her hair when she’s in a bad mood. She also wore sunglasses for the first hour she was in the office. At least she didn’t bitch about hating her job.

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My office mate, T, comes back today from a two week vacation. I’m hoping she’s in a good mood but chances are she’ll be tired and will bitch about hating this job and not having any money.

K and I are planning a minor kitchen remodel. The kitchen is fourteen years old and is starting to look it. We’re replacing the backsplash tile with something more current, painting, refinishing the floor and getting a new refrigerator.

K is rebuilding the pond this weekend. This will be the fourth or fifth time. He’s built a holding tank for fish on the lower seating area in the back yard next to the pond. I’m sure I’ll help but I’m dreading it.

My mother is still complaining about my sister’s not calling her. My mother goes to the surgeon tomorrow to discuss her option for surgery to remove the new tumor in her lungs.

Our neighbors, Tom and Sheila, spent last weekend in Beaver Creek looking at condos. Tom has a contract to publish his book. I wonder if the book advance will pay for the condo.

Our other neighbors in the Peace Corp are coming home in June. It only seems like yesterday that they left for Botswana. I wonder if they will reopen their medical practice or stay retired.

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The Biggest Bitch He Ever Met

I finally signed the settlement agreement with my former employer. I agreed to a settlement offer in the arbitration meeting two months ago. It has taken two months to finalize the terms of the agreement. The last two weeks were spent haggling over the language in one sentence. The company’s lawyer has been less than cooperative. My lawyer said she was the biggest bitch her ever met in thirty years of practicing law. The checks should be in the mail. I so happy it’s finally over.

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More Cancer

My mother has cancer again. The good news is that it is not small cell so the chemo and radiation have killed off the small cell cancer for now. My mother’s doctors are meeting this week to decide on a treatment plan.

When I talked to my mother she was in a fairly good mood. My SIL told her to get outside and enjoy the warm weather. My mother is afraid to sit on the fronth porch because she doesn’t want to get shot. According to my mother the neighborhood is 80% black. “They” all have guns. I told my mother my black friend, Lynn, doesn’t own a gun but she ignored the comment. When I suggested she sit in the backyard she came up with an excuse I don’t even remember. Why does she always have to be a victim?

I came up with an excuse to end the call with my mother. I just couldn’t continue the conversation. It’s the same conversation over and over again.

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Updates 4/6/2011

I mailed a $2,000 check to the IRS this week. This is the first time I have ever owed more federal tax than I paid in. I cringe when I look at the amount I paid. I should be grateful for the money I make and not concentrate on the taxes I pay.

The problem engineer is misbehaving again. She has started hijacking emails. Instead of creating a new email she replies to an existing email with a totally unrelated subject. She’s too lazy to change the subject line which makes for a really confusing email. She’s also been forwarding emails to associates who are not involved in her projects. This causes the recipient to reply with an inquiry as to why they were copied. Her engineering documents are sloppy and have many mistakes which creates more work for the developers and test team. The team is really frustrated with her and she has become the joke of the office again. The department does nothing because he doesn’t like conflict.

The weather has been changing ever day. Hot one day, snow the next. It was sunny and hot yesterday but today is cool and overcast. There have been five or six wildfires so far this spring. It’s really early for wildfires but there hasn’t been a lot of precipitation expect in the high country. The Crystal fire is currently burning west of Ft. Collins. The fire has burned 1,500 acres and 15 homes so far. It is only 15% contained.

My mother started crying last night while I was talking to her. She’s can’t understand why my sister will not call her yet my mother will not call my sister. She counts the days since they last spoke but does nothing to resolve the situation. I’m tired of hearing about it. You’re probably tired of reading about it.

Back on March 11th, I speculated that some religious wingnut would blame the gays for the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. I was close. Evangelist Cindy Jacobs has blamed the disaster on the repeal of DADT. God must really be hateful if he, or she, punishes the Japanese for the repeal of DADT in the United States.

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3 Years, Really?

I went to the oncologist last week. I’ve been cancer free for three years now. The universally accepted protocol for rectal cancer treatments no longer calls for CT scans at this anniversary. I still have to see the oncologist and my colon rectal surgeon every six months for check ups until I reach my five year anniversary. Then I’ll be officially in remission.

My mother, on the other hand, will have her lung biopsy on Tuesday and will get the results on Friday. I trying to stay positive but the cards are not stacked in her favor. It’s going to be a tough week.

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